A True Outsider
by TheMusician94
Summary: Forced to run away from her parents and pose as a boy to fit in with the gang of greasers she's know for years, Charlie gets the chance to tell her story from start to finish, facing a past she already tried so hard to forget. Bad summary, good story.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So I love the Outsiders A LOT and so does my best friend. So I decided one day to make a Fanfic, and here I am! If I get one or two reviews on this at least, I will post the next chapter which is already written. So, review review, review!**

I pushed my short, brown, wavy hair out of my eyes, and slicked it back with some grease. I tied up my blach hi-tops and looked in the mirror. I smiled approvingly at my reflection.

My name is Charolette Andrews, but my friends don't know that. They think my name is Charlie...well that could be short for Charolette, right? I'm sixteen, turning seventeen in March.

What the guys didn't know was that I'm a girl. See, I live in the East side of town with my friends: Darrel Curtis, Sodapop Curtis, Ponyboy Curtis, Dallas Winston, Two-Bit Matthews, Steve Randal, and Johnny Cade. We're greasers. Lower than the middle class, we're completely on the outskirts of society. My friends can't know that I'm a girl, or else I'll be forced to be alone again. Either that, or I'll have to turn to the greasy girls that smoke and drink and swear too much. I hate them, and frankly want nothing to do with them.

I have deep brown eyes, which are way darker than my hair. Sometimes Ponyboy and Johnny look into them and say they see a whole other world behind them. I dunno if that's true or not. I also have a roundish face, and a small nose. My ears aren't too big, but they are a little bit pointed at the top. Boy am I skinny. Probably as skinny as Johnny. I didn't eat much, considering I used to live ont he streets before.

When I was about twelve or thirteen I moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma with my parents. About three months later, they moved and left me behind. I hadn't seen them since. For about a year or two after that, I wandered the streets alone, just barely surviving. That's when Ponyboy and Johnny found me. That's when the three of us became best friends. They were tossing a football around the lot, when they found me by one of the bushes, half-starved and covered in newspaper. I was then adopted into the gang. By then I already dressed like a boy and wrapped up my chest like I do now. I wasn't planning on telling them I was a girl.

I got up and slipped on my jeans jacket. I unlocked the door. Darry made a spare room for me at the Curtis house. He insisted I stay there. Their parents accepted me right away, but they died months later. None of the Curtis boys have been the same since. I don't remember their parents much, but I know they do,

I walked into the living room, and looked around. Soda was relaxing on the couch for his day off, Darry would be home soon, but someone was missing.

"Hey Soda," I said, walking over to the kitchen. "Where's Ponyboy?"

He rolled over. "He said he was gonna go out somewhere and pick up Johnny to do something."

I nodded and swallowed my orange juice in a few gulps. "I'll see if I can find him."

"Alright," Soda said as he took off his shirt. Boy did he look good without his shirt, like a movie star or somethin', but I had to calm down before he realized I was staring. I tunred and belted out the door, nearly knocking Darry over as I went past.

"Is Pony inside?" he asked me. I shook my head. Darry pounded up the stairs, and I disappeared before things could go the wrong way.

I ran myself down to Johnny's house, and peered just inside the fence. He was sitting on the steps.

"Hey Johnny!" I said as I walked over. I smiled at him. He was the only one who knew I was really a girl. He found out completely on accident though, cause one night I was talking to him and it slipped out. I thought about telling Ponyboy too, to be fair, but I couldn't quite get the words out. Anyways, Johnny kept his mouth shut about it real good.

"Hi Charlie." He returned the smile. I saw a familiar gleam flash in his dark eyes. The gleam that made me stop and wonder what the hell he was thinking.

I sat next to him, suddenly frowning. "How's...?" I nodded towards his front door.

He lifted up the sleeve of his faded blue jeans jacket. He had a welting bruise on his upper arm. "Not as bad as usual." He said.

I reached across and grabbed his arm carefully. I gently brushed my fingers over the bruise, but stopped when he sucked his teeth in a bit.

"Sorry..." I said. I let his arm go and pulled back. He looked at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing..." He replied after a brief pause.

I stood up. "We have to go find Ponyboy. Darry an' Soda are worried sick about him."

I started to jog out through his gate, and down the street to the corner. Johnny tried to keep pace with me. He wasn't the fastes runner, Ponyboy was, but he did pretty good at keeping up.

We stopped at another corner, and looked around. Ponyboy loves movies, so I knew he'd probably be at the movie house.

We suddenly heard a scream, and I knew it was Ponyboy when he started calling for Darry and Sodapop. We ran in the direction of his screaming, and stopped when we saw him at a patch of grass, and a bunch of Socs on top of him. Dally was by us in a second, and when they saw him, they ran towards their blue corvair. Dal leaped over the fence, and ran over to their car. Our gang started coming from every direction. Steve reached into the front passanger seat, and was belting on him. Sodapop attacked the driver, Two-Bit was at the back windows, and Dally disappeared then came back with a 2x4 in hand. Darry was in front of Ponyboy, checking if he was okay.

Johnny's nerves were suddenly back. For some reason when he was around me or Ponyboy or both, he'd become a bit more talkative and a little less nervous. I didn't blame him for it. If a couple of Socs with rings came up and belted me for no reason, I wouldn't be too happy about it neither.

I glanced at Johnny for a moment, and when I got his silent approval, I ran towards the corvair, pelting every huge rock I could find. One connected with the windshield and put a crack in it. I heard a Soc swear loudly as I turned back to where Ponyboy and Darry were,

Soda ran past me and kneeled next to Ponyboy. He placed his hands on his shoulders. "You okay, Ponyboy?"

Ponyboy turned away with tears in his eyes, and didn't say a word.

"It's okay," Sodapop said, "They ain't gonna hurt you no more."

Johnny was by my side so fast, I jumped a little when I turned and saw him. He smiled quickly when he saw it.

Ponyboy was on his feet, and we all started towards the Curtis house.

"What were you doing walking out here all by your lonesome?" Steve was getting started. I honestly didn't mind Steve Randal that much, except for when he would start in on Ponyboy.

"I didn't think-"

Darry cut him off. "'I didn't think..' That's all I ever hear from you. You must think in school with all those good grades. You must think any other time with your nose always in a book. At home and anywhere else, you don't even use your head."

Soda sighed. "Leave my kid brother alone. It ain't his fault he likes movies so much."

I bit my lip. When Sodapop stuck up for Ponyboy, Darry would usually lay off, but I wasn't gonna be around if he decided to start in on Soda too. Darry can be unpredictable.

Darry's face got hard. "When I want my kid brother to tell me what to do with my other kid brother, I'll ask you-kid brother." He layed off and walked away.

Johnny glanced at me, then at Dally, and I cocked an eyebrow and did the same. "When did you get out of jail, Dal?" I asked.

He smirked. "A few days ago. Got out on good behavior."

Johnny smiled. I knew he admired Dal, and I couldn't blame him. That's just the kind of person Dally is. Even if you hated him, you couldn't help but have respect for him. I snorted.

"I'm gonna go to the Nightly Double tomorrow," Dally continued, lighting a cigarette. "Anyone wanna join?"

"Yeah, I'll go," I said. He nodded in my direction to show he heard me.

"Johnny? Pony?"

Johnny nodded, and Ponyboy said "Yes" after he got permission from Darry.

"Pony, it's time to come inside and do your homework." Darry said.

Ponyboy left, and Johnny and I were alone. We sat on the front steps, smoking a few weeds before I told Johnny I was going in when it got dark.

"Are you stayin' here, or going' home?" He knew I'd rather he didn't go back to his house.

"I'll go home and if things get too rough, I'll come back."

I nodded and went inside. "See ya."

"See ya." Johnny repeated as he walked off the porch and into the night.

Instead of going to bed, I went into Ponyboy's room, and we talked while he did his homework. We talked for hours. Darry didn't usually let me bug him when he was doing schoolwork, but Darry knew that he and Johnny were the only ones I had to talk to.

Ponyboy and I talked until Sodapop came in the room, flopped on the bed, and told us to get to sleep.

"See ya, Pony," I said as I stood up. "Night Soda."

"Night," he mumbled sleepily. I turned and headed to my room. I kicked off my shoes and dropped on the bed, suddenly realizing how tired I was. I closed my eyes, and was soon fast asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, I woke up bright and early, and when I was dressed and walking out of my room, I found Two-Bit in front of the TV, drinking a beer and watching Mickey Mouse.

"Hey, Two-Bit."

He took a swig from his beer. "Hey."

I grabbed a piece of chocolate cake from the freezer, and ate half of it in one bite. Two-Bit started laughing in the other room. I snorted and looked over at the screen door. Johnny was there, and he walked in casually.

"Hey Johnnycake!" He smiled. For some reason, he liked when I called him that.

He leaned against the counter, and I finished off my piece of cake, waiting for Ponyboy to come out. When he finally did, I said, "Come on! Dal is waitin'!"

We ran out the door,and to one of the corners we found Dally at. We went into a drugstore and goofed around for a while. After that, we went to the Dingo then behind Spencer's Special to chase a couple of junior high kids across a field. By then it was dark enough to sneak into the Nightly Double.

We sat down in the seats in front of the concession stand. I looked down to the front row, and saw two girls sitting there alone. Right away I knew they were Socs, but there was something about them that set them apart from the rest. One had long red hair, the other had short brown hair.

Dally saw them and smirked. He had that familiar gleam in his eye, and I knew right away that something bad was gonna happen.

Dally moved and sat in the row right behind them. I looked at Johnny quickly. Right away, Dal started talking dirty to them. My eyes widened, and Ponyboy shifted uncomfortably.

Johnny was shaking a bit next to me. When I looked over, he jumped up and said, "I'm gonna get a coke." He looked at me.

"Yeah, me too..." I got up and followed Johnny over to the concession stand. We stood in the line.

"Man," I said, stuffing my hands in my jeans jacket. "I admire Dally, but sometimes he picks the wrong times to harass people."

Johnny just nodded, and the line kept moving forward. I looked at him carefully. He looked back.

"I'm fine." He replied before I could say anything. He smiled at me warmly.

We got our cokes, and went back to our seats. Dally was gone, and Ponyboy was behind the two girls now, talking to them. We sat next to him, and I looked at the girls.

"I'm Charlie. That's Johnny." I jerked a thumb in his direction.

The red head half smiled at me. "Cherry Valance. That's Marcia."

I smiled. Johnny looked around for Dally. He must not have seen him pass us in the line.

A few minutes later, Dal returned with a bunch of cokes in arm. He handed one to Marcia, one to Ponyboy, then one to Cherry. He sat down next to her.

"This might cool you off," he said, smiling.

Next thing I knew, Cherry's coke was out of her hand, and Dally's face was dripping wet.

"Maybe that'll cool you off, greaser. When you wash your mouth out, and learn to talk and act decent, maybe I'll cool off too." She stared at him with a hard look on her face.

Dally smiled wider, and I knew Cherry would be in for a whole lot of trouble. I knew that smile.

"Fiery huh? Just the way I like 'em."

He reached over, ready to touch her. My mouth was hanging open from when she threw the coke at him. Suddenly, Johnny stood up. "Leave her alone, Dal."

I stared at him in disbelief. Johnny had never stood up to Dal before.

"What'd you say?" Dally stared.

Johnny got a bit quieter. "I said, leave her alone."

Dally stared a little longer, then walked out.

Cherry smiled. "Thanks, he had me scared to death."

Johnny smiled back. "Sure didn't look it. No one talks to Dal like that."

"From what I saw, you do."

Marcia turned around, and said, "How about you three come sit with us so you can protect us?"

Johnny, Pony, and I exchanged glances. I just shrugged and hopped over the seats. Johnny sat on my right, and Ponyboy was in between Marcia and Cherry.

We were joined by Two-Bit a little while later, and we finished watching the movie. I realized as we left the Nightly Double that Marcia and Cherry couldn't get home. Eventually after they talked about it, Two-Bit was ready to drive them home.

We started in the direction of his house, when a blue mustang pulled up. Cherry got real nervous and Johnny's eyes got wide.

Two Soc boys walked out and towards Marcia and Cherry.

"Cherry, what are you doing? Why are you with these scums?" The boy with short, curly, dark red hair looked at her.

Johnny was staring. I looked over and saw rings on the Soc's hand. My throat got tight.

"Bob, I told you before I wasn't going to deal with your drinking anymore and I mean it!" She turned away from him.

"We were only drinking a little," Bob replied.

"A little? You call reeling and passing out in the streets a little?"

The other Soc tried to talk to Marcia, but she gave him the cold shoulder.

Before I knew it, Two-Bit and Bob and the other Soc (whose name was Randy) were ready to fight. Ponyboy had a busted up bottle in his had, and Two-Bit had his switchblade out. I grabbed Johnny's arm, and backed up some. Two-Bit was always looking for a fight.

Cherry and Marcia gave in and finally went with the Socs. They gave us a dark glare before they got in their mustang and left.

I bit my lip and turned away. "Such hatred."

Two-Bit left and I noticed Johnny was breathing in shallow gasps. Ponyboy's face was blank and pale. "Let's go to the lot," I suggested. No one said a word, but followed reluctantly.

"You okay?" Ponyboy asked Johnny after a while. He gave a curt nod.

"You go to the same school as her?" I asked.

Pony nodded. "She's a cheerleader."

We got to the vacant lot, and sat by a log. I put my arms behind my head, and leaned back against it. Johnny and Ponyboy did the same. Johnny's face was still pale, and his lip was quivering.

"Johnny...?" My eyes grew wide.

"I can't take much more," Johnny and Ponyboy sat up suddenly. "I'll kill myself or something."

"Don't," Pony said hurriedly. "You can't kill yourself, Johnny."

"Well I won't. But I gotta do something. It seems like there's gotta be someplace without greasers or Socs, with just people. Plain ordinary people."

"There is..." I said. Johnny looked at me, and I shut my mouth and leaned back again.

Ponyboy started talking, and dammit, I listened to every word. Pony was good at telling stories. I imagined every single thing he said, until before I knew it, I'd fallen asleep.

"Charlie?" Johnny shook me gently. "Pony?"

We woke up and looked around. "What time is it?" I asked drowsily,

Johnny shrugged. "Darry is gonna kill me," Ponyboy stood up. "You coming?"

I glanced at Johnny, then shook my head. "I'll hang with Johnny for a while."

Ponyboy was gone. I looked at Johnny, then bit my lip a moment. "Johnny?"

"Hmm?" He looked at me.

"I never told anyone this," I looked at my fingers, then said, "but my parents used to hit me."

He stared at me, wide-eyed. "What did they do?"

I breathed slowly. "They'd hit me with belts and rulers and sticks and books, and anything they found. When they left it was because I fought back, and they realized they couldn't control me anymore like they used to."

"So they just left?"

I nodded. "I was alone and scared."

I lifted my pant leg, revealing a long scar. He touched it carefully. My eyes suddenly watered as I remembered the incident. I blinked back a few tears. "Can I tell you something else?"

He nodded. "You're the first person who truly cares for me," I said, "And the first person I truly care for back."

He grinned. "Ponyboy cares about you. So does the rest of the gang."

"Yeah, but not like you."

Suddenly, he leaned over and kissed me. My breath caught in my throat, but I didn't stop him. When he pulled back, I stared at him.

"I-I..."

"I've been waiting to do that for a long time, but I kept chickening out." He smiled.

I finally caught my breath, then leaned over and kissed him. This time it was longer, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. What a great image for a greaser, right?

When we pulled away, I couldn't help but smile at him. I felt my cheeks flush as I moved next to him, and layed my head on his shoulder.

"You know, this will be completely complicated because no one can know I'm a girl, right?"

"I don't care." He replied.

We sat there for a few more minutes, talking about anything and everything, until Ponyboy ran up and collapsed in front of us.

"Come on, we're running away." He said breathlessly before he got up and started to run. Johnny glanced at me, then followed Ponyboy.

I blinked a few times, then, not wanting to get left behind, I got up and ran after them as fast as I could.


	3. Chapter 3

We ran to the corner of a street about two blocks away, and I finally stopped with my hands on my knees, breathing deeply.

"Ponyboy," I said when I finally caught my breath, "What happened?"

Johnny passed Pony a cigarette and a light. He took a few puffs and said, "Darry hit me. I don't know...sometimes we get along fine, then all of the sudden he blows up on me or is naggin' me all the time. He didn't used to be like that. Now he just can't stand me."

"I think I like it better when the old man is hittin' me." Johnny shoved his hands in his jeans jacket.

"Let's walk around the park a little bit then head home," Ponyboy said after a while.

I nodded and Johnny and I followed him. It was colder when we got to the park. We wandered toward the jungle gym and climbed it. We settled on top, smoking a few weeds to calm us down.

When we were near ready to go home, we saw the blue mustang. It drove slowly and unsteadily around the park, and stopped. The socs stepped outand walked over, the front two I recognized as Bob and Randy.

"What do they want?" Ponyboy muttered next to me.

"Yeah," I replied, "This is our territory. What are they doing this far East?"

Johnny's face went white, and he shivered. I put a hand on his arm, trying to calm him down.

We climbed off the jungle gym, and faced the Socs as they walked up. Bob smiled and said slowly, "Hey, whatta ya know? Here's the little greasers that picked up our girls. Hey greasers."

He was drunk. I could tell by his breath, he way he walked, and how he slurred his words a bit. I suddenly remembered that Johnny had the switchblade in his back pocket.

Johnny's voice was low. "You're outta your territory. You guys better watch it."

Randy glared at him. "No pal, you better watch it."

"You know what a greaser is? White trash with long greasy hair."

My face got hot. I exchanged a glance with Ponyboy, and knew automatically what to say. Ponyboy, Johnny, and I had that kind of connection.

"Wanna know what a Soc is?" I crossed my arms. "White trash with mustangs and madras!" And at that moment, Ponyboy spit at them.

We took off toward the fountain in the middle of the park. The Socs followed us, and just when I thought we'd get away, they caught up and started belting us. Some Socs had Ponyboy by the fountain, and others were holding off me and Johnny at different ends of the park.

A Soc with black hair hit me a few times in my face, and kicked me in the stomach. I felt my nose break, and felt blood run down my face. I glanced over to where Johnny was, and saw them kicking him in the stomach as well. At that point, I desperately wanted to get up and help him. He already got beat up by Socs once before, I didn't want it happening again. I tried to crawl over to him, but they wouldn't stop belting me. I closed my eyes as I took another blow to the stomach. Wasn't anyone going to help?

I shut my eyes tighter and tighter, until I realized that no one was there. When I slowly opened my eyes, the black sky opened up before me. I sat up, clutching my side, and looked over.

Ponyboy was soaked and passed out near the fountain, Johnny was near Ponyboy, and a Soc was lying no more than two feet away from me. When I took a closer look, I saw it was Bob and there was a large pool of blood around him. Johnny was holding the knife in his hand, blood dripping from it.

I got a lump in my throat, and I quickly forgot the pain radiating from my body. I crawled myself over to Johnny. His face was pale, and he was shaking again.

"Johnny...?" I placed a hand carefully on his arm.

He slowly looked in my direction, his lip quivering. My stomach flopped and my breath was shakey.

Before I could even get a hold of the fact that this was reality, Ponyboy stirred next to us. He rolled over and saw Bob. He looked at Johnny, his hair and clothes dripping on the ground.

"I killed him..." Johnny's voice startled me. "I killed that boy...I killed him..."

Ponyboy looked back at Bob, and I tried not to picture him laying there in a pool of blood.

"I think I'm gonna be sick..." Ponyboy got up fast.

"Go ahead man," Johnny replied as his face grew smaller and smaller. "I already was."

I stared at Johnny's pale face. He barely even blinked he was so scared.

When Ponyboy was through, he walked back over to us.

"What are we going to do?" I whispered.

"We gotta go see Dal! He'll know what to do!" Johnny said suddenly. He jumped up and started running. Ponyboy and I exchanged a glance, then followed.

"He's probably at Buck Merril's" I gasped.

Johnny nodded, and that's where we went. As we got to Buck Merril's place, we saw that all the lights were on, and there was music shaking everything.

We jogged up the steps, and Johnny knocked on the screen door. At this point, we were all shivering, but Ponyboy was the most.

Buck came to the door and said, "What do you want?"

"We need to see Dally," I said.

"He's busy."

"Just tell him its Ponyboy, Johnny, and Charlie, man. He'll come!" Johnny had an impatient look on his face.

Buck closed the door and disappeared into the house. When we looked in the window, we saw Dally walking up, shirtless.

"What?" Dally said when he opened the door.

"Johnny killed a Soc," Ponyboy said, still shivering.

Dally's eyes got wide. "Okay, come with me."

We followed him through the party. All over there was kissing, drugs, sex, and booze. I rolled my eyes as Pony tried to get nosy and he looked in a room. Dally pulled him away and led us back to the room. He closed the door behind him.

"Take off that shirt," he said as he tossed a very large dry shirt over to Ponyboy.

"Here." He handed us fifty bucks, and a gun. Johnny shoved it in his pocket. He handed Ponyboy his worn brown leather jacket. "Hop the three-fifteen freight to Windrixville. There's an old abandoned church on top of Jay mountain. There's a pump in the back for water, and buy a week's supply of food as soon as you get there. Then don't so much as stick your noses out the door. I'll be up there as soon as I can."

I stared at Dally, and tried to steady my breathing.

Before I knew it, we were out the door and running towards the train tracks.

We ended up in the car of a train, and I leaned against the wall, trying to catch a breath. We ran the whole way there.

When Johnny and Ponyboy were safely in, I leaned my head on Johnny's shoulder sleepily. Ponyboy layed down with his head in Johnny's lap.

I fell asleep, and didn't wake up again until Johnny was shaking me and Ponyboy.

"Come on guys wake up! We gotta go!"

And suddenly, I was in mid air, and I hit the ground with a thud. My breath got knocked out of me.

I closed my eyes in pain, and heard Johnny's voice to the left of me. "Blast it Ponyboy! You must have put my legs to sleep. I can barely stand up. I could barely get off that train."

"Sorry," Ponyboy mumbled to the right of me. I was breathing too heavy to giggle.

"You're gonna have to ask someone where Jay mountain is. Make like a farm boy taking a walk or somethin.'"

I sat up, finally able to breathe again, but my chest was still hurting.

"For Pete's sake, run a comb through your hair Ponyboy, and quit slouching like a thug!"

I looked up. Ponyboy's hair was all over the place. He reached into his pocket, and combed it back.

"You know, you're looking more and more like Sodapop everyday," Johnny said, still rubbing his legs.

Pony smiled. "I look about as much like Soda as you do. He's good looking."

"Shoot, you are too."

Ponyboy hopped over the fence and walked on. There was a silence between me and Johnny until he said, "You okay Char?"

I nodded. "Just got the breath knocked outta me is all." I crawled over to him. "How's your legs?"

"Fine now." He said. He layed back in the grass and I layed next to him.

"This is scary," I said quietly.

"Yeah, how fast its been happenin' and all."

I rolled over to my side, and looked at him. "I mean, just yesterday we met Marcia and Cherry at the Nightly Double, and now we're here because Bob is dead."

Johnny turned and faced me too. "Uh huh."

"I'm scared...what if they find us. What will happen?"

"I don't know," he replied, "but I'm scared too." he closed his eyes.

I placed my hand on his. "Its okay."

"Charlie, whatever happens, I'm glad you're with me."

I smiled. Then I sat up, and pulled my knees to my chest. I shivered as a small breeze ripped through the air. I knew morning was coming soon.

Ponyboy came back in no time, and before I knew it, we were walking up the back steps of the old abandoned church. As soon as we walked in, I collapsed on the floor of the main room, and was slowly drifting off. I wiped some cobwebs from underneath me, and was soon fast asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews guys! I'm working insanely hard on this like you wouldn't even believe! Please keep reviewing! It helps me finish a chapter faster.**

**Shoutout to: Twilight90202- For being a reader since Chapter 1 was posted. Thanks so much for reading and posting a review on just about every chapter! :D**

**And DrowningFromTheInside- For reading and liking my story even though her's is ten times better! (BTW KEEP UPDATING TRAVELIN' SOILDER xD) **

**Anyways, on to Chapter 4!**

When I woke up, I saw Johnny slipping on his shoes and heading for the door. My first thought was that we were still at home, but then the memory came rushing back like a wave. "Where ya goin'?" I said as I sat up quickly.

"Gettin' some stuff. Remember what Dal said?"

I nodded. "Can I come?"

He looked at Ponyboy, who was sleeping a little ways away from me. He sighed, then said, "Okay."

I smiled and jumped up. I quickly slipped on my shoes, and my jeans jacket. I ran to the door. "Come on!" I whispered excitedly.

"Hold on," Johnny said. He wrote a note for Ponyboy in the dirt. I tapped my foot impatiently, as Johnny jumped up and ran over. "Okay, let's go!"

We ran into the field, and it suddenly felt good to be outside again. I let the small breeze blow in my face, and all the muscles in my body relaxed as I twirled in a circle.

Johnny smiled. "I see you're happy that we aren't couped up in that church."

I nodded. "Yeah," I said, "I love being outside. If I could live out here, I would."

I ran ahead of Johnny and collapsed in the tall grass of the meadow. The sun was out, and everything was warm. He jogged up, and stood in front of me.

" Come on, now. We gotta get the food and get back to the church." He tried to be serious, but he was still smiling.

"Fine." I fake pouted as he lent a hand to help me up. Instead of letting go when I was up again, I pulled him by his arm down the dirt road.

When we were out of sight of the church, I let go. "Race ya!" I shouted and jetted down the road. He laughed and followed.

We got to a convenient store just inside of town called Masterson's. It was small on the outside with blue and white chipping paint, but on the inside it was huge and freshly painted. The cashier was a short old man, who was chubby and had glasses. He politely smiled at us as we walked in.

Masterson's had just about everything you could imagine there food wise. I grabbed some candybars, and two loaves of bread. Johnny grabbed baloney, peroxide, matches, a deck of cards, a paperback copy of Gone With The Wind, and some cigs.

We walked back up to the counter, and I looked around as Johnny paid for the stuff. I scuffed my shoes on the floor, and shifted from side to side as I waited. Over to the left of me, the bell rung as a couple walked in. The man was short and chubby. He had no hair. He was wearing a dirty Yankee's jersey, and a gray sweat pants. The woman has short, curly, brown hair, and blue eyes. Her skin was pale, and she was tall and skinny, She was wearing a long, floral, black dress.

As they walked past us, I turned towards Johnny and whispered, "Those are my parents!"

Johnny looked up quickly as they shoved past me to the counter. He held the box of stuff in his hand tightly, and said, "What do we do?"

I shrugged. "We have to get out of here before they realize who I am."

Johnny stopped and watched them through the corner of his eyes. When he was sure they weren't looking, and were safely arguing with the owner, he grabbed my arm and pulled me outside. We ran as fast as we could down the dirt road (which was hard for Johnny since he had the box), and when the store was out of sight, we stopped. I breathed deeply as I went into a fit of worry. My eyes widened and I had a hard time talking. Damnit. I wish Johnny didn't have to see my anxiety problems.

"T-t-thanks Johnny."

He walked over to me. "Char? You okay?"

I shook my head. "I-I-I get like this s-s-sometimes...when f-f-fear builds up t-t-too much..."

He grabbed my arm carefully and we walked down the road. I knew I'd be okay in about five minutes. Johnny didn't, so when we reached the church again (after walking much slower than before), he was still holding my arm even though I told him I was fine.

It was late afternoon now, and when we arrived, Johnny gave the whistle to warn Ponyboy that it was only us walking up. He came out of his hiding spot to greet us.

"Hey Johnny, Charlie. Fancy meetin' you here."

I laughed, suddenly realizing that Johnny's arm was still on mine. I pulled away as Ponyboy cocked an eyebrow at us playfully. I hoped he didn't notice.

We went into the church, and Johnny set the box on a table. I wandered over to the window, my mind drifting off. The meadow to the side of the church that I was running through earlier with Johnny was calm now, as the breeze from earlier stopped.

I tried to imagine Johnny and I running through it again as if I were someone else watching. What did people see when they looked at me? Did they see a greaser? Was I tough as grit? A hood? Did they see the side of me most others didn't? Or could they tell there was something different about me? Could they tell I was a true outsider?

My mind jolted back to reality as I heard Ponyboy say, "Oh no! No, Johnny, not my hair!"

"I'm gonna cut mine too, and wash the grease out, but I can't bleach it. My skin's too dark for me to look okay blond." Johnny said as I turned back to the conversation. Cut their hair? Were they crazy? For greasers, our hair is EVERYTHING. The wouldn't look right with hair as short as mine. Besides, Ponyboy's hair is what makes him look most like Sodapop.

"Okay," Ponyboy gave in. "Get it over with."

I got up and walked into the other room. I didn't want to watch. I sat on the floor, and found myself staring out of the window in there. Suddenly, nature was more open to me than it ever had been.

Back at home, I had no time to stop and see nature, what with rumbles and gang problems and everything. I loved to watch nature, and sometimes I even sat with Ponyboy and watched sunsets. We never said anything, we just watched. I think he enjoyed the company. That was what best friends were for.

Pony and Johnny came into the room a while later, and I realized I must have been day dreaming for longer than I thought. Their hair was short, but not like mine, and Pony's was a bright blond. My mouth dropped as he crossed his arms, and leaned against the wall staring at the floor angrily. "My hair looks lousy," He said.

"No it doesn't, Pony." Johnny looked at me with pleading eyes.

"Yeah," I chimed in. "You look great! Like a...young Paul Newman."

He rolled his eyes. "He doesn't have blond hair."

I shrugged. I tried.

Ponyboy was still angry and complaining about his hair the rest of the day, and I knew that this was going to be a long week before I even knew we'd only be there for a week. How long were we going to stay originally?

I pondered that while I was laying on the church floor, trying to get some sleep. I was unsuccessful, and I found myself staring at the ceiling.

I rolled onto my back, put my hands behind my head, and looked around. Ponyboy was sleeping on the bench nearby, and I barely noticed Johnny sitting on the other side of the room. He was awake, and his lips were turned into a tight frown.

I sat up and whispered to him, "Johnny?"

He glanced over at me. "Hmm?"

I crawled over and sat next to him. "What's wrong?"

He shrugged. "Just thinkin'."

"About?"

He paused. I watched as he picked at his shoe laces. When the silence seemed unbareable, he said, "Do my parents care? I mean, are they upset that I'm missing?" He looked at me as if searching for an answer that was written on my face.

I shook my head slowly. "No..." He looked down. I bit my lip and continued. "But neither do Steve's or Dally's or maybe even Two-Bit's. It doesn't matter Johnnycake. As long as you got good friends that care about you, then everything should be fine." I pulled my knees up to my chest like I always did.

He looked at the ceiling. "Glory, I can't believe I killed Bob..."

"Me either."

I watched Johnny carefully. He wasn't a fighter. Even though he got hit by his drunken father everyday, and yelled at by his mom a lot, he didn't hate anyone. He would never intentionally hurt a person, let alone kill them. 'Course, if he got up in front of a judge, no one'd believe he was innocent, given the fact that he comes from the East side of town. What confused me was the fact that he was such a kind person, while people like Dal hated the world and everyone in it. One thing I knew for sure though, was that Johnny Cade was no Dallas Winston. Even if he looked up to Dal and sometimes followed him, they were not the same person.

"Johnny," I began slowly. "You're not a bad kid. You were defending us. Defending Ponyboy." I nodded in his direction. "I hope that if we do get caught, a judge and jury realizes that."

Johnny layed his head on my shoulder. "You know," he said after a bit of silence, "One day you're gonna have to tell the gang that you're a girl. At least tell Ponyboy cause he's one of your best friends and he's gonna find out sooner or later."

"Johnny Cade! Are you implying that I'm acting like a girl?" I said playfully. He chuckled.

"No..." he said sarcastically.

I shoved him. We ended up talking late into the night. Neither of us wanted to go to bed and rush the next day, nor did we even mention anything that happen just the night before again. We just talked as if things weren the same. As if Johnny didn't pull out that switchblade in Ponyboy's defense. As if he didn't kill someone. As if we didn't hop a train to Windrixville. As if we weren't staying in an old abandoned church, hiding from the cops. It was as if nothing had changed...but deep in our hearts we knew it wouldn't be the same.

I didn't even think about what Johnny said about telling Ponyboy that I was a girl. Not at all, until two days later when Johnny went out to the water pump.

Ponyboy was on the other side of the room, eating a baloney sandwich. He had been sad lately, and I knew for sure it had to be because he was homesick.

I was sitting across from him, picking at my nails, when I said, "Ponyboy can I ask you somethin'?"

"Yeah?"

"How does it feel? You know, diggin' movies and sunsets so much, and bein' different from the gang?"

Pony chewed carefully, and thought for a moment. "It's hard. You feel like you're too different, and like people wouldn't understand you if you even tried to explain yourself to them. You feel alone."

I nodded. "Other times its great, because you feel like you're part of a secret club or somethin'."

"Yeah, I understand."

Ponyboy took another bite of his sandwich. "Yeah, just like how you feel since you're the only girl amongst all us good lookin' boys."

I stopped and stared at him. My heart stopped, and he smirked at me. How did he know?

My mouth dropped. "How in the hell did you figure it out?"

Ponyboy shrugged. "You talk in your sleep. I heard you say that you really were a girl, among other things."

I jumped up. "What did I say?"

"That you hate your parents and you're glad they dumped you."

I sat down and breathed. Johnny came back in no time, and brought along some fresh water. I was quieter than usual, lost in thought. I kept think about how Ponyboy found out about it. When did he find out? I thought about it all day, until I fell fast asleep.

**AN: So there you have it!**

**Oooo getting interesting!**

**The question is, did Ponyboy find out the way he said he did, or is he hiding something?**

**What else could he have found out?**

**Tune in for the next chapter! Review please! Thanks!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Oh jeez sorry for the long wait guys! We got piled with essays and review packets and still are! Plus, SAT prep is soon! YIKES! On the bright side, I am still writing, and I did my English essay on The Outsiders! :D Anyways, enjoy!**

The next morning, I woke up to an empty church. I looked around and found Ponyboy and Johnny to be nowhere in sight. It was barely sunrise.

I stood up, rubbing my aching neck, and walked into the other room. I figured they were there, reading some of Gone With the Wind, but they weren't.

"Ponyboy? Johnny?"

I walked over to the window. They were in the back by a fence, watching the sunrise. In all the years I've known him, I've never seen Johnny watch a sunrise.

I smiled, and ran out of the back door. I flew through the grass until I was where they were. I stood next to Johnny on his left side, as Ponyboy said, "Nothing Gold Can Stay."

"What?" was Johnny's reply.

"Nature's first green is gold,

Her hardest hue to hold.

He early leave's a flower;

But only so an hour.

The leaf subsides to leaf.

So Eden sank to grief,

So dawn goes down to day,

Nothing gold can stay."

"Where'd you learn that? That's what I meant," Johnny said.  
"Robert Frost wrote it. He meant more to it than I'm gettin' though. I always remembered it because I never quite got what he meant by it."

I smiled as we watched the sunrise together. I finally felt free for the first time since we had to run away to the abandoned church. I felt like my mind and body were free.

We found our way back to the church, but the good feeling was fading. Suddenly, I was reminded of why we were there in the first place.

The next day, I was leaning against the window of the church as the sun came out and warmed up my back. Ponyboy and Johnny were asleep on the two benches in the church.

The past four days had been boring. I was sick of baloney, and mad that we had to stay in or near the church, so I couldn't bask in the sun or run through the meadow again. I sighed longingly as I stared out of the window.

My mind was getting lost again, where I heard a creek on the back steps. I froze, then flipped out my switchblade. I guess Johnny heard it too, because he got up suddenly, and wasn't far behind me. We crept near the door, and nearly jumped out of our skins when Dallas Winston came out and grinned at us.

"Glory, Dal," I whispered after I calmed down, "You had us scared to death!"

"Shhh!" He said. He crept across the room to where Ponyboy was laying.

He carefully nudged Ponyboy in the ribs, and said, "Glory, he looks different with his hair like that."

Ponyboy sat up, and yelled, "Hey Dally!"

"Hey Ponyboy! Or should I say, Sleeping Beauty?"

"How's Sodapop? Are the fuzz after us? Is Darry alright? Do the boys know where we are?"

I leaned against the window and pulled out a smoke as Ponyboy reeled off a bunch of questions.

"Hold on kid," Dally said suddenly. I lit my cigarette. "I can't answer everything at once. You want to get something to eat first? I skipped breakfast and I'm about starved."

"You're starved?" Johnny said as he slipped on his jeans jacket.

"Is it safe to go out?" I asked after I took a puff.

"Yeah. Got a cancer stick, Charlie?" Dally replied.

I nodded, pulled out one, and tossed it to him.

"The fuzz won't be lookin' for you around here. They think you've lit out for Texas. I've got Buck's T-Bird parked down the road a little way. Goshamighty ain't you been eatin' anything?" Dally asked.

"Yeah?" Johnny said.

"Whatever gave you the idea we ain't?" I asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"You're pale and you've lost weight. After this, get out in the sun more. By the way, Ponyboy, I gotta letter for you." Dally pulled a piece of paper from his back pocket.

"Who from?" Pony asked.

"The President of the United States. From you're brother, Sodapop."

Ponyboy bent over the letter, and I looked out the window again. I couldn't wait to be outside again. When he was done, he looked up and said, "How come you got hauled in?"

I looked at Dally curiously and he smiled. "Shoot, kid, them boys at the station know me by now. I get hauled in for everything that happens on our turf. While I was there I kinda let it slip that y'all were headin' for Texas. So that's where they're lookin.'"

I crossed my arms as I turned towards the window. I watched as the sun peaked out og the clouds. I smiled.

"Y'all want something to eat or not?"

"You'd better believe it!" Ponyboy said excitedly.

Before I knew it, Pony and I were in the back of Buck's red and white T-Bird, with Johnny in the passanger seat, and Dally in the driver's seat. Dally loved driving fast. Normally I'd say something to him about it, but this time I was just so glad I was finally out of the church and the wind was blowing on my face. I smiled, and I guess Johnny must have seen me through the rear view mirror, because he chuckled.

We pulled into a Dairy Queen just inside of town, and we choked down burgers, fries, and sundaes. It felt good to be eating something other than baloney.

"Glory," Dallas said as he watched us eat, wide eyed. "You don't need to make like every mouthful's your last. I got pleanty of money. Take it easy, I don't want you gettin' sick on me. And I thought I was hungry!"

I took another bite of my hamburger, making sure to savor each bite. Dally finished his third burger, then said, "The Socs and us are having all-out warfare all over the city. That kid you killed had plenty of friends and all over town its Soc against grease. We can't walk alone at all. I started carryin' a heater."

I cringed when Dally started talking about Bob, and shot a worried glance over at Johnny, but he didn't seem phased.

"You kill people with heaters!" Ponyboy nearly shouted.

"Ya kill 'em with switchblades too, don't ya kid?" Johnny gulped when Dally said that. "Don't worry, it ain't loaded. I ain't aimin' to get picked up for murder. But it sure does help a bluff. Tim Shepard's gang and out outfit are havin' it out with the Socs tomorrow night at the vacant lot. Yeah, just like the good old days. If they win, things go on as usual. If we do, they stay outa our territory for good. Two-Bit got jumped a few days ago. Darry and me came along in time, but he wasn't havin' too much trouble. Two-Bit's a good fighter."

I bit my burger and slurped on my coke. I stared at the mud on my shoes. I knew deep in my heart that no matter who fought and who won, everything would still be the same. The greasers would still be greasers and Socs would still be Socs. Nothing would change.

"Hey, did I tell you we got us a spy?" Dally said as I pulled myself out of my thoughts.

"Who?" I replied.

"That good lookin' broad I tried to pick up that night Johnny killed the Soc. The red head, Cherry what's-her-name."

"Cherry?" I asked.

"The Soc?" Johnny and Ponyboy said together.

"Yeah, she came over to the vacant lot the night Two-Bit was jumped. Shepard and some of his outfit and us were hanging around there whe she drives up in her little Ol' Sting Ray. That took a lot of nerve."

I ate the final bite of my burger, then started in on my fries.

"She said she felt that the whole mess was her fault, which it is, and that she'd keep up with what was comin' off with the Socs in the rumble and would testify that the Socs were drunk and looking for a fight and that you fought back in self defense. That was a good idea, I mean cuttin' you hair and bleachin' it." Dally said as he looked at Ponyboy and Johnny. "They printed your descriptions in the paper but you sure won't fit em now."

Johnny had been silent for a long time, and then he finally said, "We're goin' back and turn ourselves in."

"What?" Dally shouted.

"I said we're goin' back and turn ourselves in. I got a good chance of bein' let off easy. I ain't got no recored with the fuzz and it was self defense. Ponyboy, Cherry, and Charlie can testify to that. And I don't aim to stay in that church all my life. We won't tell that you helped us, Dally, and we'll give you back the gun and what's left of the moneyand say we hitch hiked back so you won't get into trouble. Okay?"  
I was surprised. Johnny was usually quiet, and it seemed like his speech was well thought out. My eyes darted from Johnny, to Ponyboy, and finally Dally.

"You sure you guys wanna go back? Us greasers get it worse than anyone else," Dally said after a moment of silence.

Finally, Johnny nodded. "I'm sure. It ain't fair for Ponyboy and Charlie to have to stay up here in that church with Darry and Soda worryin' about them all the time. I don't guess my parents are worried about me or anything?"

I hadn't thought about it before. I always knew that they cared about Ponyboy, but Darry and Soda cared about me? It seemed unreal.

"The boys are worried. Two-Bit was going to Texas to hunt for you."

"My parents," Johnny tried not to plead. "did they ask about me?"

"No," Dally snapped, "they didn't. Blast it, Johnny, what do they matter? Shoot, my old man don't give a hang whether I'm in jail or dead in a car wreck or drunk in the gutter. That don't bother me none."

I looked at Dally. His face was turned into a tight frown, and his icy blue eyes were staring intensely at the dashboard. Dallas Winston was one of the most angry and cold people I knew, but at that very moment, I saw something in him that I knew I would never see again: compassion. Masybe he did care that his father didn't give a hang about him.

At that moment, Dally cussed under his breath, and we tore out of the parking lot. The car tore down the road and sped off in the direction of the church. It was a long time until the silence was broken, and it was by Dally.

"Blast it, Johnny why didn't you think of turning yourself in five days ago? It would have saved a lot of trouble."

"I was scared," Johnny replied. "I still am...I guess we ruined our hair for nothing."

"I guess so."

We were silent once again. I watched as we flew down the road and past all the trees. When I looked at everyone in the car, Johnny was starring at the dashboard, Ponyboy was watching the trees like me, and Dally was glaring at the road, his hands gripping the steering wheel so hard, his knuckles were white.

"Johnny," Dally finally said. His voice was a little high and pleading. "Johnny, I ain't mad at you. I just don't want you to get hurt. You don't know what a few months in jail can do to you. Oh, blast it, Johnny, you get hardened in jail. I don't want that to happen to you. Like it happened to me..."

"Would you rather have me living in hide-outs for the rest of my life, always on the run?" Johnny replied.

Dally didn't get the chance to answer, because we finally reached the church, and found it on fire.

**A/N: So there you have it! I hope this makes up for the long absence of writing.**

**So there are a couple of things I wanna say (sorry if the AN is long).**

**First off, you know how they say Socs and greasers, and Soc is capitalized? Well that has always bugged me. I know its really important to the story, considering Socs were supposed to be better and richer than greasers, but still it bugged me a lot. We all know the Socs aren't better than greasers.**

**Also, I watched The Outsiders last night with my cousin cause she had never seen it before! :D**

**And lastly, there are a few questions that were asked pertaining to this story, so I figured I mine as well answer them but without giving it away.**

**Q: Does Charlie ****actually have a reason to pretend she is a boy or was it just to fit in?**

**A: It was just to fit in with the greasers. Charlie was alone with no friends, and she didn't want to find friendship within the greaser girls because she didn't like them.**

**Q: Does her being a girl effect the outcome of the story?**

**A: Well, you'll just have to find that out for yourself! :D**

**Stay tuned! Review please!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thanks for those who read, and about the review thing, I deleted the AN that was chapter five originally before, because it didn't match with my notebook and it bothered me how I was typing chapter 5, but it said chapter 6. Sorry guys, but if you can, just review the 5th chapter while you do the sixth. Thanks! So, my late updating was due to me falling, spraining my ankle, and ending up in the hospital. Sorry guys. :( I am finally able to walk, run, and jump again, and I'm extremely happy! Thank you for being so patient. Also, finals and test and packets got in the way, so I am finally updating! Also, special thanks to DrowningFromTheInside for not only being an amazing writer, but also for letting me ruin this chapter for her to get advice and an opinion. Thanks, you rock! Here we go! (BTW! YOU NEED TO UPDATE TRAVELIN' SOILDERS)**

My mouth dropped as Dally slammed on the breaks. I stood up and noticed a crowd near the church.

"Let's go see what the deal is," Ponyboy said as he hopped out of the car. I stole another glance through the rear view mirror at Johnny, then we both scrambled out of the T-Bird and followed him.

"Get back in here before I beat your head in!" Dally yelled.

We caught up to Ponyboy, and he tapped the nearest adult. "What's going on?" he asked.

"Well, we don't know for sure," the man said. "We were having a school picnic up here and the first thing we knew, the place is burning up. Thank goodness this is a wet season and the old thing is worthless anyway."

A woman came running up shortly afterwards saying, "Jerry, some of the kids are missing!"

"They're probably around here somewhere. You can't tell with all this excitement where they might be."

"No. They're been missing for at least half an hour. I thought they were climbing the hill..."

We listened closely and faintly, we heard yelling from inside the church.

"I told them to play in the church!" The woman yelled.

"I'll get them!" Ponyboy suddenly shouted, and he made a dash for the church. Johnny and I exchanged looks, and followed.

We caught up to him, and broke open a boarded up window. Smoke poured out and I coughed a little as we climbed through.

"That guy coming in?" Pony asked.

I looked behind me. "No."

"The window stopped him," Johnny replied.

"Too scared?"

"Naw," Johnny said with a grin. "Too fat."

I breathed deeply as we looked for the little kids. I didn't understand how Johnny could so calmly crack a smile, while I was standing there so scared, I felt like I would throw up. I started shaking.

We went to the back room, and found a group of little kids huddled in the corner. I ran to a nearby window, the one I was looking out of just hours before, and busted it open. One by one, Johnny and Ponyboy handed me the kids. I dropped them carefully outside to Dally, and suddenly, Johnny was pushing us.

"Get out!" he shouted.

I climbed out of the church, and collapsed on the ground. By this time, I was coughing and breathing heavy. Every breath hurt more than the last. Having asthma and inhaling all that smoke didn't help none.

My vision started to go fuzzy, and I tried to lift my head up, but was unsuccessful. Ponyboy collapsed next to me, and I heard screaming from inside the church. It was Johnny.

"Johnny..." I tried to choke out, but I knew no one could hear. I closed my eyes, and was out cold.

When I opened my eyes again, I was in an ambulence. My breath was shallow, and my lungs still hurt everytime I breathed. When I looked over, Ponyboy was next to me as he came to.

"Are they taking us to jail?"

"Jail?" I heard a voice say. It was the Jerry guy.

"Where's Johnny and Dallas?" Ponyboy asked hoarsely.

"In the other ambulence right behind us."

"Are you taking us to the police station?" Ponyboy blinked.

"Why would we want to take you to the police station? You're going to the hospital," Jerry said with finality.

"Are Johnny and Dally all right?"

"Which one's which?"

"Johnny has black hair," I said as I took a deep, raspy breath, "and Dally's the mean looking one." Ponyboy looked over at me as if he just realized I was there.

"The towheaded kid is going to be all right. He burned one arm pretty badly trying to drag the other kid out of the window. I don't know about Johnny. A piece of timber fell on his back-he might have broke it. He passed out before he got out the window and they're giving him plasma now."

I dropped my head back down. I didn't hear much more of what he said. Johnny couldn't die...he just couldn't.

"You four boys are truly heroes." Jerry's voice broke my thoughts.

I chuckled a little. Even this Jerry guy thought I was a boy. That'll show Johnny...I froze as I remembered.

"We're taking you to a hospital by where you live," he said.

I covered my face with my hands, and was quiet the rest of the way there.

Ponyboy and I were still in the hospital, waiting to hear anymore news about Johnny and Dally. My hands had burns on them from the fire, but they weren't too bad. I would have scars on them for the rest of my life, though. I did inhale a lot of smoke and had to be prescribed an inhaler. The doctor told me I'd have breathing problems for a while, but they were hoping it wasn't too serious.

We waited with Jerry Wood, and Pony and I tried to keep our minds off of Dally and Johnny-mostly Johnny.

Suddenly, they wheeled the two past us. Dally was awake and sure enough, threatening us. I stifled a laugh, until Johnny came past. He was unconcious, and his neck was burned severely. They covered the rest of his body, but he was shirtless.

I turned my face away, towards Ponyboy, trying to stop the tears from falling. He hugged me, and through the silence, I whispered, "What's going to happen when we get home?"

Ponyboy dropped his arms, and I sat up. I wiped a stray tear away. "I mean, after the rumble?"

He looked at his fingers, then said, "I don't know."

I leaned back against the wall, and covered my face. Jerry suddenly came back, and said, "There are some boys here to see you two. They claim to be your brothers."

Ponyboy and I exchanged a glance, then we jumped up and ran to the hallway. Soda stood there with his famous grin, and Darry was just behind him. Ponyboy smiled and ran to hug them, as I hung back and watched them. Sodapop ran his fingers through Ponyboy's hair. "Ponyboy! Your tuff hair!"

Their eyes fell on me. I slowly walked forward, and Pony and I were engulfed in a family hug.

"Soda, Darry? Can I ask you something?" I said as we broke apart.

"Sure," Soda replied.

"Do you guys really care about me like you do Ponyboy?"

"What?" Darry said. "Of course we do!"

"You're not a stranger anymore, you're our little brother."

I smiled, but then it was gone in a flash. "I have to tell you guys something..."

"Yeah?" Darry asked.

I swallowed, then looked around. I had to tell them, even if it meant being kicked out of the house and having to find friendship with greaser girls. They showed me so much hospitality, they deserved to know. It wasn't right to lie to them.

"What is it?" Soda said.

"I-" I stopped and looked at Ponyboy. He nodded.

"I'm a girl..." I finally said.

Sodapop chuckled and said, "No..."

I nodded. "I am."

"Its true," Ponyboy said.

"I can prove it if you want..."

Darry looked at me with wide eyes before saying, "No, that's okay...Why did you hide it from us?"

"I was afraid that you guys would look at me differently...like you'd treat me like the greasy girls that walk around here all the time."

Sodapop suddenly grabbed me into a hug. "You've got us. Don't worry, we won't treat you any different. You're family now. You belong in the gang just as much as Johnny and all the others do."

I smiled as, once again, I was engulfed into a huge hug.

We stayed at the hospital until it was late at night. Ponyboy was getting hassled by reporters all over wanting to ask him about what happened and about Johnny killing the Soc. Sodapop got tired of them and he took one of their cameras and went around taking pictures of everyone in the hospital and acting like a reporter. All the reporters laughed and eventually left us alone.

Finally, we got home after being told that Dally going to be fine, while Johnny might die. Darry and Sodapop carried Pony and I into the house, and put us to bed.

The next time I opened my eyes, it was pitch black in my room, and someone was standing over me.

"Charlie?" It was Ponyboy.

"Hmmm?" I replied.

"Is it alright if I sleep in here?" he asked.

I sat up when he said this. "Don't you have Sodapop sleepin' in your room with you?" I said drowsily.

"Yeah, but I couldn't sleep, and I need someone to talk to."

I shifted over and let him get in the bed. I looked down and realized I was still in my jeans, T-shirt, and jeans jacket. Ponyboy was still in his clothes too.

We laid on our sides and faced each other. "I'm worried about Johnny," he said.

"Me too...he doesn't deserve this. Especially with all he's been through, and everything that happens to him everyday."

We were silent for a moment. "Char?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think he'll die?"

My breath caught in my throat. All this time I tried not to think about Johnny dying. He was my first kiss, my first love, the first person who had carried so much for me. I swallowed hard. "I sure hope not..."

Ponyboy didn't say anything for a while afterwards, but I knew he was trying not to cry. I was trying not to cry myself.

"Pony?" I asked after a while.

"Yeah?" He was still awake.

"There's something I've never told anyone but Johnny..." I breathed. "My parents abused me." I lifted my leg and showed him the scar I had shown Johnny about a week ago. The same night he killed Bob.

Ponyboy's eyes widened. "Was it worse than Johnny?"

I shrugged. "I dunno...I've been stabbed in the stomach by my father..."

I sat up, turned on my light, and showed him. Ponyboy ran his fingers from my right side to my left, tracing the huge scar.

"What happened?"

"My dad was like Johnny's; alcoholic. My mom was too. They'd cut me all the time, beat me, and more. One day, my dad caught me trying to go to a friend's house when he wanted me to stay home. He didn't like me having friends. Next thing I knew, he grabbed a knife and dug it into my stomach. I tried not to cry, I fought back the tears. I was bleeding like crazy, and I passed out. When I opened my eyes, I was in the hospital and my dad told them some sob story that I was trying to cook something to eat and the knife slipped. The worst part about it, was they believed him, fixed me up, and sent me on my way."

"Glory!" He stared at me.

"Yeah...and..."

"What?"

"Well, he took me home...I was sitting on the couch and he called my mother to tell her all about it. Apparently my mother thought he was stupid for cuttin' me up like that, cause she said sooner or later they'd put two and two together and come to the house to arrest them." I gulped then continued, "He got off the phone and was pissed off. He hit me some more then left the house. About an hour later he came home drunker than anything I've seen, and he...he..."

"Charlie?" Ponyboy looked at me.

"He saw me...he smiled...he leaned over me and tried to touch me...I pushed him off and ran up to my room...he followed me...he broke in and...he...he raped me...oh gosh Pony, it was horrible!"

Ponyboy's mouth dropped open and he pulled me into a hug. "Oh my god!"

I pulled back after a few moments. "I didn't cry. I knew that if I cried, he'd laugh at me for being weak. I spit in his face, I glared at him...he left the room with a smile on his face and passed out. Mom didn't come home that night. I climbed downstairs when it was late, and I grabbed a knife from the kitchen...I saw him passed out...I stabbed him in the chest...he bled everywhere...I called an ambulence, but I beat it out of there before they got there. He survived Pony...I know because Johnny and I saw him the day we went to get supplies in Windrixville...The worst part is that I _wanted_ him dead..."

Ponyboy stared at me. "Wow...I had no idea...glory!"

I nodded as he pulled me into a hug again. I pulled away after a few moments, and shut of my light. Then we layed down and he threw his arm around me.

"One thing that has gotten me through a lot of problems in my life," I said, breaking the silence, "was the fact that things get better. I kept focusing on the good things in life, trying to block out the bad. I never forgot that day, but I tried not to let it run my life either..."

Ponyboy smiled. "Well, that's some good advice. I should do that more often..."

I smiled and closed my eyes.

"You know what I've always wondered?" he asked suddenly.

"Huh?" I looked at him.

"Is Charlie your real name?"

"No...well it could be. My real name is Charolette, but I made everyone call me Charlie."

He laughed. "I'm calling you that from now on!"

"No you're not!"

"CHAROLETTE!"

"La, la, la not listening!"

"Charolette! Charolette!"

"GOOD NIGHT PONYBOY!"

He smiled at me. "Goodnight."

With his arm still wrapped around me, I closed my eyes, and fell fast asleep.

**A/N: YAY! FINALLY GOT IT UP! Hopefully, chapter 7 will be up soon! It's already written! Review please!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A****/N: :OOOO It's been a long time since I updated! **

**Prepare for excuses:  
**

**1. It was summer vacation, and I had intentions of having fun every single day until school started, because I am now in my Senior year.**

**2. I've been worrying about filling out college applications, visiting college, practicing for my audition for college (I'm going for Music Performance! :D) **

**3. I haven't even updated "The Outsiders Chatroom" on Youtube with my best friend (We're on like four or five now. If you want the link, send me a message)**

**So, yeah, that's about it. This chapter, and the next chapter have already been written, just not posted on here. XD Catch up time! **

**I really hope I didn't lose any followers, and thank you to those who are sticking with me even though I may take forever to update! I hope you all enjoy!**

**Special thanks to: DrowningFromTheInside for being an awesome author, and I hope you can read this and/or update Travelin' Soldier soon! I'm eager to read what happens next!**

**On to Chapter 7!**

When I woke up the next morning, Ponyboy wasn't there. I looked around as the sun streamed through my window, and hit my face. I shielded my eyes, and got up.

The floor was cold, which made me shiver. I wandered out of my room, to find Ponyboy in the kitchen, cooking. The first one up always has to make breakfast, and looking around, I knew it was Ponyboy.

"Hey Ponyboy," I said as I walked in. I flashed him a smile.

"Hey Charolette...I mean Charlie." He laughed.

"Keep your trap shut! You want the whole gang to know I'm a girl?"

He shrugged, and I turned my back him. I reached into the icebox for the chocolate cake. When I turned back around, someone yelled, "Anyone home?" It was Steve.

"In here!" I replied. Ponyboy looked at me sternly.

"Don't slam the door," he said as he continued making breakfast.

Of course, the door slammed, and Two-Bit and Steve came running in. They swung Ponyboy around, making his eggs fall.

"Now lookwhat you did," he complained, "There went our breakfast. Can't you wait 'till I set the eggs down before you go shovein' me halfway across the country?"

I chuckled as I grabbed a slice of cake.

"Look at the blond headed monkey!" Two-Bit jeered.

"Aw, lay off!" Ponyboy said, annoyed.

Steve smiled. "Naw you had to get your hair cut to get your picture in the paper. How you like bein' a hero?"

"Huh?" he replied.

Steve shoved the paper at Ponyboy, and he started to read it. "Charlie, you're in the paper too," Steve went on, "if that's your real name."

"What are ya talkin' about?" I said, trying to hide the bad feeling in my stomach, but Steve just smiled wider.

"All this time we didn't even know you was a girl," Two-Bit piped in. "You sure can hide things."

My mouth dropped open, and I ran over to Ponyboy. Our pictures were in the paper, and underneathe mine, it said **CHAROLETTE ANDREWS** in big black letters.

"Oh glory! Now everyone knows!" I shouted.

Steve's face suddenly went serious. "So it _is_ true?"

I nodded.

"Why didn't you say anything?" Two-Bit asked after he stopped laughing.

I sat in one of the chairs. "Well, I thought you'd look at me different. Like, you'd look at me as another greasy girl trying to act tough, instead of the Charlie you've known for years."

Steve ruffled my hair. "Shoot kid, we don't see you as any less of a boy than before."

I smiled, reached for my slice of cake, and tried to take a huge bite. While trying to get the chocolate off my face, Ponyboy said, "They're thinkin' of puttin' us in a boys' home?"

I stopped mid-chew, and looked over at him. He tossed the paper and said, "No, they ain't goin' to put us in a boys' home."

"Don't worry." Steve replied, "They're probably not goin' to. They also said they might find Charlie's real parents, and hand her over to 'em, but that's probably not gonna happen neither."

I nearly choked on my cake, and shouted, "WHAT?"

"Yeah, they were talkin' about it. You have a separate court hearing from Ponyboy, and it's to fight against going back with them."

I slammed my fist on the table, spilling a little milk. "I sure as hell ain't goin' back with those bastards. Not in a million years. No siree bub!"

"Relax," Two-Bit said. "They probably won't."

"Where's Doa and Superdope anyhow?" Steve asked.

I shrugged, but Darry came walking in no more than two seconds later. He was dressed and ready for work.

A few seconds later, Sodapop came running in asking where his blue shirt was. I shrugged.

"Hate to tell you, buddy" Steve replied, "but you have to wear clothers to work. There's a law or something."

"Oh yeah, where are my jeans Darry?"

"I ironed. They're in my closet. Hurry up, you're gonna be late."

"I'm hurryin', I'm hurryin'." Soda muttered as he ran out of the room.

"Darry," Ponyboy asked, "did you know about the juvinile court?"

"Or about the hearing with my parents?" I piped in.

"Yeah," Darry replied. "The cops told me last night."

"I had one of those dreams last night. The ones I can't ever remember..."

"What?" Darry spun around.

My eyes widened and I watched Ponyboy carefully. After his parents died, Ponyboy started having bad dreams that made him scream and sweat. He could never remember what happened in the dream that scared him so much.

"Was it very bad?" Two-Bit asked.

"No." I knew Ponyboy was lying. He must have has the dream right before he came into my room and woke me up. He seemed restless and a little bit frightened when he came in.

Sodapop and Steve came running in just then, and Soda said, "You know what? When we stomp the Socs good, me and Steve here are gonna throw a big party and everyone can get stoned. We'll chase those Socs clear to Mexico."

Darry started passing out pieces of cake to everyone, and I grabbed another piece.

"You gonna take Sandy to the party?" Ponyboy asked.

It was silent before Soda replied, "No, she went to live with her grandmother in Florida."

"How come?" I replied softly.

"Look," Steve got angry quickly/ "Does he have to draw you a picture? It was either that or get married, and her parents almost hit the roof at the idea of her marryin' a sixteen-year-old kid."

"Seventeen," Soda corrected. "I'll be seventeen in a couple of weeks."

I forgot that Sodapop and I were just about the same age. He seemed so much older and wiser, when really we were only a few months apart.

"We'd better get to work, Pepsi-Cola." Darry said, breaking my thoughts.

"I hate to leave you by yourselves," Darry said as he got ready.

"I've been by myself before," Pony replied.

"Yeah," I replied, sitting on the arm of the couch, "and you're forgetting I lived out on the streets on my own for a few years."

"I'll baby-sit them," Two-Bit said, and him and Pony started wrestling. I watched them laughing as Darry, Soda, and Steve left for work.

"We gotta clean up this house," Ponyboy stated. "Reporters or police or the guys from the state might come by to check up on us."

"This house ain't messy, you should see mine." Two-Bit said.

"I have, and if you had the sense of a billy goat, you'd try to clean up your place 'stead of bummin' round ours."

"Shoot, kid, if I did that my mom would die of shock."

I laughed and stole a glance at Ponyboy. We grinned at each other, then got to work.

**A/N: And there you have it! So sorry if the chapter is boring, or if there isn't much. I promise you, the next chapter will be really good! :D Thank you for staying with me and reading though I don't update much! I love you guys, you make me want to keep writing. :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Okay, so I know I haven't updated in a little while, but I have stellar news! (Does anyone even use that term anymore? Maybe I should use savvy. xD)**

**I have finished writing this fanfiction...Now all that's left is to type up the chapters and post them more often!**

**That means I can also start my Supernatural fanfiction, and I can post two chapters of this fanfiction instead of the usual one!**

**The only unfortunate news is that I will not be updating my other fanfiction Lovers and Fighters any time soon. *Sad face* I don't really know where to go with that story, so updating won't be for a while yet.**

**Now on to the chapter!**

After we got the house cleaned, Two-Bit, Ponyboy, and I headed towards tenth street. Ponyboy was wearing Dal's brown leather jacket-the same one he wore the day the church set on fire. The back of it was black from when it caught fire.

"I would drive us," Two-Bit was saying as we tried to hitch a ride. "but the brakes are out on my car. Almost killed me and Kathy the other night." He lit a cigarette. "You oughta see Kathy's brother. Now there's a hood. He's so greasy he glides when he walks. He goes to the barber shop for an oil change, not a haircut."

I chuckled, but when I looked at Pony, he didn't look too good.

We went to the Tasty Freeze to relax a little and drink some cokes, and suddenly I noticed the blue Mustang that pulled in. Ponyboy and I exchanged glances. We would have beat it out of there, but Two-Bit wouldn't let us. He just tossed us each a cig, and the Socs from the park that night Bob died came out of their car and walked over.

I looked in Pony's direction, and saw his face harden and his greenish-gray eyes become cold. I knew he felt the same way I did towards them. I blamed them for everything that happened-especially for the fact that Johnny was lying in a hospital bed on the brink of death.

"You know the rules. No jazz before the rumble," Two-Bit said as he took a drag of his cig and tried to look tough.

"We know," Randy Adderson said. He looked over at Ponyboy. "Come here, I want to talk to you."

I watched as Ponyboy followed Randy to his car. Two-Bit stood next to me, poking fun at the other Socs and laughing at their expense. I watched their facial expressions as they talked in the distance, and wondered what could be coming from their mouths; what they could be thinking.

After what seemed like forever, Ponyboy finally came back over, and the Socs got in the car with Randy and left.

"What did he want," Two-Bit asked after they left. "What'd Mr. Super Soc have to say?"

"He ain't a Soc," Pony said, "he's just a guy, and he just wanted to talk."

I looked at Ponyboy's face, and noticed that every ounce of hatred he had a few minutes ago was gone. His green gray eyes were soft, instead of cold and hard.

We kept on walking towards the hospital Johnny and Dally were staying at. When Two-Bit was out of earshot, I said, "What did he say to you Pony?"

"Well, he told me about how he didn't want to be in the rumble and told me he didn't think fightin' was worth it."

I stared at him with wide eyes. This was the same Randy Adderson that no more than a week ago walked up with a group of Socs and aimed to make us "pay" for "picking up on their women." The same person who attacked us and tried to drown Ponyboy. Could it be that he really had the same feelings and regrets as us greasers?

Then it hit me: people aren't always what they appear to be. Looking at a group of greasers, people would never think that any one of them would hate fighting or would keep their noses out of trouble like Pony, Johnny, and I.

Just like people judged us greasers, I was judging the Socs, and I suddenly felt ashamed of myself. Johnny and I had always talked about how we wished people would stop judging each other, but I had never realized that I was doing the exact same thing. That was the moment I decided I wouldn't do it anymore.

"Are you still gonna be in the rumble?" I asked.

"Well, yeah." He replied as if it were obvious."

"But Ponyboy, even Randy knows that fighting is no good and that nothing will change after it. All you're gonna do is get hurt!"

Ponyboy looked at me. "But it's a greaser tradition!"

"Yeah well what happened to you not being like every other greaser?"

He looked to the ground. "And what do you think you're gonna gain from fighting?" I asked with pleading eyes.

Ponyboy didn't say anything. In fact, he kept quiet the rest of the way to the hospital.

When we got there, the nurses wouldn't let us see Johnny, because he was in critical condition. Just when we thought that we couldn't see them, the doctor came out and said, "Let them go in. He's been asking for them. It can't hurt now."

As we walked in, I noticed Johnny was lying facedown. My voice caught in my throat, and I knew I wouldn't be able to choke out anything.

"Hey Johnnycake," Two-Bit said.

"Hey." Johnny sounded like he was trying to be cheerful.

"They treatin' you okay?" Pony asked.

"Don't…don't let me put enough grease in my hair." He struggled to speak.

"We'll bring some hair grease next time," Two-Bit replied. My eyes began filling with tears as he went on, "We're having the big rumble tonight. Too bad you and Dally can't be in it. It's the first big rumble we had." Johnny's eyes were wide, but he didn't say anything. "Did you know you got your name in the paper for being a hero?" Two-Bit continued.

"Tuff enough," he replied.

"Do ya want anything?" Two-Bit asked.

"The book…can you get me another one?"

Ponyboy looked at Two-Bit. "He wants another copy of _Gone With the Wind_."

Two-Bit nodded. "There's a drugstore nearby, I'll go check there."

Ponyboy sat down as Two-Bit left. There was a short silence before Johnny said, "Did Charlie come? She's quiet…"

"Y-yeah…" I said quietly.

He held out his hand weakly in the direction of my voice because he couldn't see me. I knelt down in front of him so that we were face to face.

He stroked my cheek lightly with his fingers. "Charlie…?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

My breath caught in my throat, and I felt my eyes begin to water. "J-Johnny…I love you too…"

At that moment, I could think of nothing better than kissing him one more time. I leaned forward and gently touched my lips to his. The kiss was sweet, but full of sorrow and longing. I had a feeling that this would be the last time I ever saw Johnny, which was suddenly tearing me apart. I think he knew it too.

When I pulled back, I began to just bawl my eyes out. I couldn't hold it in anymore, no matter how hard I was trying to be strong for Johnny. When I looked up at him, he gasped suddenly.

"You okay Johnny?" Ponyboy asked.

"Yeah," he replied weakly. "It just hurts sometimes. It usually don't…I can't feel anything below the middle of my back…I'm pretty bad off, ain't I?"

"You'll be okay…" I whispered, trying to wipe my tears away and regain composure.

"You gotta be," Ponyboy said, "we couldn't get along without you."

I caught my breath and nearly started crying again.

"You want to know something guys? I'm scared stiff. I used to talk about killing myself…I don't want to die now. It ain't long enough. Sixteen years just ain't long enough. I wouldn't mind it so much if there wasn't so much stuff I ain't done yet and so many things I ain't seen. It's not fair. You know what? That time we were in Windrixville was the only time I've been away from our neighborhood."

"You ain't gonna die," Ponyboy said firmly, "and don't get juiced up, because the doc won't let us see you no more if you do."

Johnny closed his eyes and was silent for a little bit. I watched him, taking in his features and thinking about all the conversations him and I ever had, and about all the things he told me he wanted to see. The things you see by living on the wrong side of town can tear you apart sometimes.

"Johnny," a nurse came into the room. "Your mother is here to see you."

"I don't want to see her," Johnny said with an edge of anger in his voice. "She's probably come to tell me all the trouble I'm causing her and about how glad her and the old man'll be when I'm dead. Why don't you tell her to leave-" Johnny suddenly broke off and passed out cold.

"You have to go," the nurse said as she tried to hurry us out of the door.

Two-Bit came in, and handed the nurse the book. "Make sure he gets it."

We rushed out the door, and Two-Bit said, "I wish it was any one of us except Johnny. We could get along without anyone but Johnny. Let's go see Dallas."

Ponyboy and I followed Two-Bit as we made our way down the hall. When we looked, we saw Johnny's mother. She had straight black hair and big dark eyes like Johnny, but hers were filled with hatred rather than sorrow. She wasn't anything like Johnny.

"But I have the right to see him. He's my son!" She shouted. "After all the trouble his father and I've gone to raise him, this is our reward? He'd rather see those no-count hoodlums than his own folks…" She saw us and gave us the coldest look I have ever seen. "It was your fault! Always running around in the middle of the night getting jailed and heaven knows what else!"

I don't know what happened to me, but at that moment, something snapped.

"Don't act like you gave a damn about him!" I shouted.

Her eyes widened, and Ponyboy put a hand on my shoulder, trying to lead me away.

"Excuse me?" She said, "I care more about him than any of you hoodlums!"

"Yeah right! You care enough about him to constantly yell at him and hit him? Whoever taught you that that was how you cared for someone?"

"I'm not going to have some kid tell me how to raise my son!"

The anger I'd been trying to maintain reached the boiling point. "You're just a worthless, cold hearted, bitch!"

Ponyboy tried to grab my arm, but I pulled out of his grip, and stormed down the hall. "No wonder he hates your guts," Two-Bit snapped at her before he and Ponyboy followed me.

When I got to the elevator, I slumped to the floor just before it, and began crying my eyes out. Ponyboy came over, kneeled down, and pulled me into the biggest hug. "It's okay…" he said. I pulled myself out of his grip just as the elevator doors opened.

"No, it's not okay! It will never be okay!"

I stormed into the elevator, and stood in the back with my arms crossed, trying to stop the tears from falling.

**And there you have it! So sorry to those who reviewed on the author's note that used to be this chapter, and can't review now. Don't fret if you can't review, you shall read the next chapter soon enough!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: STOP! READ THIS BEFORE CONTINUING ON!**

**What was the last thing you remember reading of this story?**

**If you last remember Ponyboy, Charlie, and Two-Bit cleaning up the house, then you need to go back a chapter.**

**If you remember what happened after that, then proceed! **

**Thanks! :D**

When we walked into Dally's hospital room, I was still sniffling and trying to stifle my tears. Dally was arguing with one of the nurses.

"Hey Dal," Ponyboy said.

He grinned. "Man, am I glad to see you! These fucking hospital people won't let me smoke, and I want out!"

We sat down.

"Shepard came by to see me a while ago," Dally said.

"What'd he want?" I asked.

"Said he saw my picture in the paper and couldn't believe it didn't have 'Wanted Dead or Alive' under it. He mostly came to rub it in about the rumble. Man, I hate not bein' in that."

I hugged my knees up to my chest. I was tired of hearing about the stupid rumble from everyone.

"Kid, you scared the devil outa me the other day," Dally said, grinning at Pony. "I thought I'd killed you."

"Me?" Ponyboy asked. "Why?"

"When you jumped out of the church. I meant to hit you just hard enough to knock you down and put out the fire, but when you dropped like a ton of lead, I thought I'd aimed too high and broke your neck. I'm glad I didn't though."

"I'll bet," Ponyboy said with a grin.

Dally seemed to be lost in thought as he looked out the window. "Uh…how's the kid?"

"We just left him," Two-Bit replied. "I don't know about stuff like this…but…well, he seemed pretty bad to me. He passed out cold before we left him."

Dally clenched his teeth, his eyes turning a dangerous color before saying, "Two-Bit, you still got that fancy black-handled switch?"

"Yeah."

"Give it here."

Two-Bit reached into his back pocket for his jet-handled switchblade, ten inches long. Twp-Bit never would lend that to Dally if he knew Dally didn't need it.

"We gotta win that fight tonight," Dally said. "We gotta get even with the Socs. For Johnny."

He put the switchblade under his pillow and lay back, staring at the ceiling. We left before Dally's mood could get the best of him.

We decided to wait for a bus instead of walk home. Two-Bit went to a gas station to buy some cigarettes, leaving Pony and I at the bus stop bench. Ponyboy started falling asleep, and I realized that he looked worse than he did before.

I was about to ask him what was wrong, when Two-Bit came back and placed a hand on his forehead. "You feel okay? You're awful hot."

"I'm alright," he replied. "Don't tell Darry, okay? Come on, Two-Bit. Be a buddy. I'll be well by tonight. I'll take a bunch of aspirins."

"All right, but Darry will kill me if you're really sick and go ahead and fight anyways."

I was almost completely silent ever since we left Johnny's room, and I was silent the whole bus ride home. I had too much on my mind. I kept thinking about Johnny, Ponyboy, Dally, Randy, and about what was going to happen to me, seeing as I still needed to go to the hearing. I was afraid that Johnny would die. I was afraid that someone would get hurt during the rumble. I was afraid that my parents would hurt me again.

We got off the bus and headed for home. It was quiet for a long while, until Ponyboy said, "Tonight-I don't like it one bit."

"I never knew you to play chicken in a rumble before," Two-Bit replied. "Not even when you was a little kid."

"I ain't chicken, Two-Bit Mathews, and you know it. Ain't I a Curtis, same as Soda and Darry?"

I rolled my eyes. Fighting had nothing to do with whether you were chicken or not. A real chicken uses his or her fists first, and asks questions later.

"I mean," Ponyboy continued, "I got an awful feeling something's gonna happen."

"Something is gonna happen!" Two-Bit jeered. "We're gonna stomp the Socs' guts, that's what."

When we walked past the vacant lot, Cherry was sitting in her Corvette.

"Hi guys," she said.

"What's up with the big-times?" Two-Bit asked.

"They play your way. No weapons, fair deal. Your rules."

"You sure?"

She nodded. "Randy told me, he knows for sure."

We turned to head home, but before we left, Cherry said, "Ponyboy, stay a minute."

He turned to look at me as if making sure it'd be fine. I nodded. "Go ahead."

He smirked at me, and walked away with her. I watched them for a moment before setting off towards home, suddenly feeling worried.

I walked home slowly, watching the sun set, still thinking about everything. When I walked through the door, Sodapop shouted, "Hey Charlie! How are you?"

I shrugged and sat on the couch. I truthfully didn't know how I felt. I really just wanted to lay down and sleep. I closed my eyes, and soon drifted off.

**And there you have it! Sorry if the chapter isn't long, but the rest of the chapters are pretty much this length or a little longer. I can't wait to post the next chapters and see everyone's reactions to the end. I'm excited!**

**Please review! Even if you don't like it, review, because at least I'll know you're reading!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Unfortunately, no one has reviewed on the last two chapters, so I don't know if anyone is really reading my story anymore. Either way, I'm going to post it up until the last chapter, and hopefully someone will read it. After this chapter, there are only two more left. Hopefully I'll get reviews. Enjoy!**

X

I woke up a little while later, and sat down at the kitchen table to have dinner. Ponyboy was late (as always), so when he came in, he had to eat quickly.

When he sat down and started piling food on his plate, I asked, "So what did Cherry want?"

He shrugged. "Nothing."

I dropped it after that, realizing it was none of my business. But still, I wondered.

After dinner, I relaxed on the couch as the gang got ready for the rumble. Sodapop kept asking me if I was sure I didn't want to go, and I kept giving him the same answer. Steve called me a chicken, but I just ignored him.

"How come you like fights?" Ponyboy asked Soda.

"I dunno," he replied. "It's action. Like a contest, or a drag race or something."

I tuned them out after that, not wanting to hear anymore about it. As they were about to leave, my hatred towards fighting and anger at Ponyboy was pushed aside. I was worried that something would happen to him too, because what he said earlier kept coming back into my mind.

I grabbed his arm before he left. "Be careful," I said as my eyes started glistening with tears.

His face softened and he kneeled down next to me, making sure everyone else was outside. Next thing I knew, I was pulled into the tightest embrace I've ever had in my life. After a few moments, we pulled apart and he whispered, "I promise."

I saw the pain and fear in his eyes, which didn't settle my stomach at all. In fact, as he walked out of the house, my stomach was jumping all over the place.

I realized I wouldn't be able to do anything being so worried, so I decided to close my eyes, and try to sleep. Sleeping was my favorite thing to do, because it helps me escape everything for a while. My dreams were the only places I could go whenever I was upset or alone.

I was asleep in minutes.

X

A gentle hand was shaking me. I opened my eyes, and drowsily looked up. Sodapop was standing over me. After rubbing my face, I took a closer look at him; He had a few bruises and cuts on his face, but not too much damage. Steve had a huge cut on his cheek and a few bruises, and the only damage Darry seemed to have was a few bloody knuckles.

"Where's Ponyboy?" I asked, sitting up quickly.

"Him and Dally beat is after the rumble," Sodapop replied. "I think they went to see Johnny."

"Are they okay?"

He nodded. "Yeah, though Pony took a lot of hits."

I stood up and walked towards the front door. "Where ya goin'?" Darry asked me.

"I just need some fresh air," I replied, opening the door, and heading out.

It was a chilly night. I shivered as I sat on the porch steps, looking for any signs of Ponyboy or Dally. Something was wrong. I just knew it. Ponyboy had taken a lot of hits at the rumble, did that mean something was going to happen to him? I feared that he was even more sick than before. Above all, I feared that this overwhelmingly bad feeling was worse because Johnny was dangerously close to passing with each second that went by. I couldn't even think of what6 was going through his mind at that moment.

As the breeze blew by, I was lost in thought, until I saw Ponyboy walking towards me.

When Sodapop said that Pony had taken a few hits, he wasn't kidding; Pony's clothes were muddy, his sweatshirt was ripped, and there was a slight limp in his walk. His hair was a mess, he had a black eye, and his lip was busted open and bleeding. He looked horrible.

"Ponyboy?" I stood up as he came towards me. "Are you okay? What's wrong? Is Johnny okay? Where's Dally?"

Ponyboy's eyes casted to the floor, and he walked past me, never looking up. He walked inside, and I followed, fearing the worst.

"Ponyboy, what's wrong?" Darry asked, standing up.

"Johnny…" he started.

I shook my head. "No…" I whispered, my eyes getting wider.

"Johnny's dead." He nearly couldn't say it.

I didn't hear what else he said, because at that moment, the world around me started to spin. My breathing became shallow as a sharp pain developed in my chest. My eyes, watered, and I blinked to keep from crying. This couldn't be happening…

Next thing I knew, Two-Bit was near me, saying, "Charlie, are you okay?" He held out his arms, trying to calm me down.

I struggled in his arms. "No…"

He tried to grab my shoulders, but I backed away from him.

"Charlie, it'll be okay…"

"No…no it's not…"

His arm found its way to my shoulder, and I pushed it away. "NO!" I screamed before running out of the door and down the street.

My heart began pounding in my chest as I ran faster and faster. My vision soon blurred, making it near impossible for me to see what was going on. My breath grew heavy and fast as my lungs stung, and I fell to my knees, trying to breathe. I gasped and coughed, but I still felt light headed, and I couldn't catch my breath.

Suddenly, I felt a pair of strong arms around me, and I looked up to find Darry. He knelt next to me, hodling me in his arms.

"Shhh," he said, "it's okay. Don't cry…"

I hadn't realized that I even started crying, but I didn't protest as he picked me up and started carrying me back in the direction of our house. I still struggled to breathe as the reality of everything hit home: Johnny really was dead.

At this thought, my stomach lurched, and I turned my head away from Darry to puke on the ground. I coughed and choked as darkness started to cloud over me.

"Darry…" I whispered. He looked at me.

"Yeah?"

"I can't breathe…"

He placed his hand on my forehead as everything became dark.

X

When I next opened my eyes, I was in my room, with the light streaming through the window. I blinked and rubbed my throbbing head, as I saw Darry sitting in the chair opposite my bed. I stared at him for a moment as I tried to remember what happened. Darry sat up further in his chair when he noticed I was awake.

"Oh, good. You're awake."

"What happened?" I asked in a raspy voice. I looked at the table and took a few gulps of the glass of water that was sitting there.

"You're alright," he replied. "After you found out about Johnny, you took off down the street, and you collapsed in the middle of the road. When we got to you, you were gasping and choking like you were drowning. After we got you home, you passed out, and we called an ambulance. Steve went with you to the hospital."

I blinked, and took another gulp of water. Johnny was dead… Darry's words started ringing in my ears, bringing tears to my eyes, but I didn't want to cry in front of him.

"We couldn't go with you," he continued, "because we got a call from Dally. He robbed a store and he needed out help to get away from the cops. When we got to the lot, Dal was getting surrounded, and he pulled out that heater he had. They thought it was loaded…they started firing…"

"Is he alright?"

Darry hesitated before shaking his head. "And they didn't even care."

I groaned and immediately regretted it because my throat began hurting even more. Now Dally was dead too?

"So we were ready to go to the hospital to join you and Steve, when Pony passed out cold. We took him to the hospital too, and they evaluated you both. Pony passed out from exhaustion, shock, and a minor concussion. The doc said he'll be sleeping a lot the next few days, but he'll be fine."

"What about me?" I asked cautiously.

"The doctor said that you passed out because of shock and you had a panic attack-that's why you couldn't breathe. He also said you may have anxiety, and that is most likely another reason why you had the panic attack. The doc thinks you need to see a counselor."

I shook my head. "No way. I don't need a counselor." I buried my head beneath the blankets.

"But-"

"NO!" I shouted.

Darry sighed. "We'll talk about this when you're better. Pony's not awake yet, but I'll let you know when he is. In the mean time, you stay in bed. I'll bring ya some breakfast."

When Darry left the room, I lifted the covers off of my head. Johnny is dead. He was the only person I could talk to about anything. He was the first person who knew my secret. He was my first friend, my first kiss, and maybe even my first love.

Now he's gone.

I closed my eyes to keep from crying, and layed my head back against my pillow. The worst thing about Johnny's death was that even though I half expected it, it still hurt like hell.

I sighed, and rolled on my side. I was asleep before Darry came back with breakfast.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: So far I have gotten one review! Thank God! I was getting a little worried there. This is the second last chapter! Hope you all enjoy!**

X

I stayed in bed the next two days. Darry and Soda came in to check on me an awful lot, trying to get me to eat something, but I didn't want to. I hardly moved, and I only got out of bed when I needed to use the bathroom. It was like I was dead on the inside; Or I was in a trance. At night I couldn't sleep, and I didn't move much, until I heard Darry and Soda talking in the next room. I climbed out of bed, tiptoed over to the door, and opened it a crack.

"Soda, you need to get some sleep," Darry was saying. "Pony's awake now. He's fine."

My stomach jumped. Ponyboy was okay.

"I know," Soda replied, laying on the couch. "I just worry." He closed his eyes.

"I know what you mean. I'm worried too, especially about Charlie." My eyes widened as I listened closely. "Should we tell her that we know she was raped?"

Soda groaned sleepily. "I dunno. We might scare her, and she might not tell us who did it. She might even deny it completely."

My gasp caught in my throat and I covered my mouth, not daring to make a noise to let them know I was there. I backed up until I was sitting on my bed, then removed my hand. The same words kept playing over and over in my head. They _know_.

I waited until Darry left for work before I opened my door and peaked out. Sodapop was asleep on the couch, so I snuck past him to Ponyboy's room. Before I could get there though, I heard a voice behind me.

"Where do ya think you're goin'?"

I turned around to find Soda looking up at me with his dark brown eyes. Even though he was sleepy, I could see the amusement in his eyes.

"Uh….well…I…" I couldn't find the words to say.

"It's okay," he replied after a moment. "I won't tell Darry if you don't want me to." He grinned sleepily at me.

When he closed his eyes, I turned and headed for Pony's room. I opened the door slowly, and found Ponyboy laying on his bed under a bunch of blankets. He had two pillows underneath his head, so he could see who was walking in his room. His head was bandaged up, probably because of the concussion, and he was looking at me with his soft green-gray eyes.

"Hey Charlie," he said kinda weakly.

I turned and closed the door. "Hi." I walked over to his bed and stood by him.

He padded the space next to him on the bed. "Sit"

I shook my head.

"Charlie, it's alright. I'm not gonna die if you sit next to me, so sit."

I cautiously sat down, making sure I didn't hurt him or make him uncomfortable in any way.

"How are ya holdin' up?" he asked.

I sighed before answering. "I dunno. Did Darry tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"The doctor said I had a panic attack…the night I found out Johnny was dead."

"Johnny isn't dead," Ponyboy said with a serious face.

"What?" I looked at him. "Yes he is."

"No," he replied firmly.

I watched him, and realized he was completely serious. He really believed Johnny wasn't dead. I decided not to push the issue further, and I think he was grateful for that. I laid back next to him, and closed my eyes.

"Tired?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Not really. I feel like I'm living in hell."

"Why?"

I opened my eyes and looked at the ceiling. "Soda and Darry know."

"About wha-?" he stopped cold when he realized what I was talking about. "How? Do they know who did it?"

I shook my head as tears started coming to my eyes. "I don't know." I squeezed my eyes shut. I didn't want to cry; not here and not now.

Pony noticed that I started crying, and he grabbed me face in my hands.

"Hey," he said as he wiped my tears away, "it's okay." He pulled me into a hug, and I didn't fight it. I just laid there, crying into his chest.

I don't know how long I stayed like that, but eventually I stopped crying, and we were so tired that we both ended up falling asleep right there.

X

A few days later, I dressed up in my gray skirt and white blouse for my court date (I mine as well dress like a girl now that everyone knew). Ponyboy, Soda, and Darry got ready for their court date, and mine which was right after.

When we got to the courthouse, Ponyboy pulled me into the tightest and longest hug I ever had in my life. When he pulled away, he looked into my eyes and whispered, "Good luck."

I nodded and walked over to my lawyer who was standing outside of the room. Unlike Ponyboy's, my hearing was private, so the only people there were me, my lawyer, my parents, their lawyer, and the judge (and later the Curtis brothers).

The hearing was long and kind of boring. They asked both me and my parents some questions-with my parents lying through their teeth-and then the judge left the room for a little while before coming to a decision.

"Will everyone please rise?" he asked us after he spoke with everyone and the Curtis brothers had entered. "Based on the evidence we have, the answers you have given us, and the information we have received by the child's current guardian, we grant full custody of the child to Darrel Curtis." And with that, he smacked his gamal down, and the case was dismissed.

I didn't have to be told twice. I quickly thanked my lawyer, and turned to the Curtis brothers, who were standing in the aisle. I smiled wide, and ran over to Ponyboy, throwing myself in his arms.

"I don't have to live with them anymore," I shouted gleefully.

Ponyboy returned the hug, and said, "I know, and I'm glad."

When I pulled away from him, I looked into his eyes. Neither of us planned what happened next, but before I knew it, his face was close to mine, and he gently kissed me.

The kiss didn't last long, but I didn't pull away from him. When we finally pulled apart, he looked at me, and I remembered my first kiss with Johnny. I looked away from Ponyboy, and ran out of the courthouse, nearly colliding with Soda in my haste. I forgot they were there.

"Charlie," I heard Pony say as I ran out.

I ran to the parking lot and sank to my knees before I got to the car. A few tears slid from my eyes as I started to break down. It wasn't the fact that Pony kissed me when less than a week ago I was dating his friend who was now dead, it was the fact that I wanted to kiss him-that's what scared me the most.

X

**A/N: This is a really intense chapter. Sometimes this story gets so full of angst, that I have a hard time writing it. Let me just say that in my head, when I first thought of this story, I did not intend on making Charlie and Ponyboy kiss, I was just going to keep hinting at the fact that there would be something more between them. However, as time went on, I decided to finally write a kissing scene for them, making things just a little bit more complicated in Charlie's life, giving something more for her to run away from. As you know, the growing theme in this story is that Charlie likes to run away from **_**everything**_**, and the point is to have Charlie learn that running away won't solve her problems. **

**Any questions, comments, or suggestions? Review please! I've worked really hard on this story, and I would appreciate it if you'd give me a review, even if it's a small one.**

**One more chapter guys!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: This is the final chapter guys! Thanks to all those who have read and reviewed this story as it went along. You guys are awesome, and I love that you guys were so interested in this story(though it wasn't that different from the original). After this, I shall begin posting my Supernatural fan fiction, and try to continue posting more chapters to "Lovers and Fighters". Thanks again everyone, and if you have any questions about the story or how I created it and stuff like that, feel free to message me or ask in your review, and I will reply. Enjoy!**

X

After that day at the courthouse, things didn't really go back to normal. The gang seemed a little more segregated, with the death of Johnny and Dallas still hanging over our heads, though we never talked about it. Sure, we hung out, but it wasn't the same. Pony and I didn't talk much after that day either. I was still confused about the kiss, my feelings for him, and the betrayal I felt on my part to Johnny and his memory.

I spent most of my days in my room, instead of out and about like normal. I didn't really talk much, which I guess was okay, because I only ever talked to Johnny and Ponyboy, and since one was dead and the other was distancing himself from everyone, my only option was to keep to myself.

Things started changing a lot more than that. Ponyboy's mind wandered a lot. He started forgetting things, running into walls, and staring off into space suddenly with no warning. One day, he walked home without his shoes on, and he didn't realize until Steve pointed it out to him. His grades started to slip, and Darry and him started getting into more arguments. Sometimes in the midst of them, Pony or Darry would turn to Sodapop and try to pull him into it; make him choose sides. I just sat in the background, trying not to get in the way. The thing that scared me the most was Pony's behavior. He became cold towards everyone all of the sudden, and I sensed some of the anger in him that Dallas once harbored.

One day, Ponyboy and I were waiting outside of the local grocery store, waiting for Steve and Two-Bit to come back with some candy bars and cigs. There was a silence lingering between us, and I could tell things just weren't the same. Suddenly, three Socs pulled up in a car, and got out. They walked toward us, and I instinctively tried to grab Pony's had, but I pulled away when I realized what I was doing.

"You're the guy that killed Bob Sheldon," one said, looking Ponyboy dead in the eye. "He was a friend of ours. We don't like nobody killing our friends, especially greasers."

I looked hurriedly around, hoping Steve and Two-Bit would come to the rescue, but then Ponyboy did something I never thought he'd do. He busted the end of his coke bottle, and pointed it at them.

"You get back in your car," he said, "or you'll get split. I mean it. I've had about all I can take from you guys."

The Socs got into their cars and drove off. I stared at Pony with wide eyes, but he just looked at the broken glass on the ground.

"You really would have used that bottle, wouldn't you?" I turned to find Two-Bit and Steve standing there. "Steve and me were backing you," he continued, "but I guess we didn't need to. You'd have really cut them up, huh?"

Ponyboy looked at him. "I guess so."

"Ponyboy, listen," Two-Bit said as he placed a hand on his shoulder. "don't get tough. You're not like the rest of us and don't try to be…"

Before I knew it, Ponyboy was bending over to pick up the glass, mumbling something about not wanting anyone to get a flat tire. I watched him, wondering what would have happened if I hadn't run out of the courthouse almost a week ago. Then I stopped myself, knowing that it didn't matter now. I already did run away, as I did with everything in my life.

I sighed as I followed Steve, Two-Bit, and Pony back to school. Running away seems to be my specialty.

X

Later on that night, Ponyboy and Darry got into an argument again at dinner. I kept my head down and tried to block them out as I pushed my green beans around on my plate. All this fighting was just making me sick.

"What's the sweat about my schoolwork?" Pony shouted. "I'll have to get a job as soon as I get out of school anyway. Look at Soda. He's doing okay, and he dropped out. You can just lay off!"

"You're not dropping out," Darry replied. "Listen, with your brains and grades, you could get a scholarship, and we could put you through college. But schoolwork's not the point. You're living in a vacuum, Pony, and you're gonna have to cut it out. You don't just stop living because you lose someone. I thought you knew that by now. And anytime you don't like the way I'm running things, you can get out."

"You'd like that wouldn't you? For me to just get the hell out? Well it's not that easy, is it Soda?"

"God dammit you guys, leave me outta this!" Soda screamed as he got up and ran out of the house. His chair clattered to the floor, and the screen door slammed shut.

I looked up to see Pony and Darry staring dumbfounded at the front door. Suddenly, the rage began building up in me, and I stood up too.

"Look what you've done," I said as steadily as I could, before storming off to my room. I slammed my door and collapsed on my bed, crying my eyes out for about the fourth time since Johnny died. I've never cried so much before in my life.

X

I heard the front door open about twenty minutes later, but I didn't move. I didn't even move when I heard a knock on my door. I figured it was Darry or Soda coming to check up on me, so I replied, "Come in."

I looked and was a bit surprised to find a pair of green-gray eyes staring back at me.

"Hey," I said as he shut the door behind him.

"Hey," he replied, standing there awkwardly.

"You can sit."

He sat down, and I sat up to look at him.

"Soda, Darry, and I made up," he started. "We ain't gonna fight no more." I nodded, but I didn't look at him. Some time passed before either of us spoke. "Look," he said, "I'm sorry I kissed you." He scratched the back of his neck. "It was wrong. Johnny was my best friend, and I shouldn't have done it. I just…I liked you for a long time…"

Before he continued, I place a hand on his cheek, and leaned over to kiss him gently. The kiss was long and sweet, and I didn't feel sorrow like I did the first time we kissed. It felt right, which was why neither of us pulled away for a while.

When we finally did pull apart, I looked him in the eye. "I wasn't mad that you kissed me…I was mad that I wanted you to. I felt like I was betraying Johnny."

"What make it any different now?" He asked curiously.

I thought for a moment before saying, "Well, I don't want Johnny's death to run my life. I thought about what Darry said to you-when he talked about you livin' in a vacuum-and I realized he was right. I shouldn't give up a chance to be with a great person because of a death of another one. I mean, I'll always remember Johnny as my first love, and I'll miss him, but that doesn't mean he can be my last. Plus, I ran away from you that day, like I run away from everything. I'm tired of running. I need to face everything head on, or else I'll never take a chance or learn from my mistakes."

A smile spread across Pony's face, and he kissed me again. "So what now?" I asked.

"I dunno," he replied as he pulled out his copy of _Gone With the Wind_. I watched as he opened it, and a folded piece of people fell out. He reached for it.

"What's that?" I asked as he opened it. He shrugged and started to read. I watched his face, and waited for him to finish. When he was done, he passed it to me. I recognized Johnny's handwriting at once, and started to read it.

_Ponyboy, I asked the nurse to give you this book so you could finish it. The doctor came in a while ago but I knew anyway. I keep getting tireder and tireder. Listen, I don't mind dying now. It was worth it. It's worth saving those kids. Their lives are worth more than mine, they have more to live for. Some of their parents came by to thank me and I know it was worth it. Tell Dally it was worth it. I'm just gonna miss you guys. Tell Charlie I love her and I want her to stay positive and happy. I've been thinking about it, and that poem, that guy that wrote it, he meant you're gold when you're a kid, like green. When you're a kid everything's new, dawn. It's just when you get used to everything that it's day. Like the way you dig sunsets, Pony. That's gold. Keep that way, it's a good way to be. I want you to tell Dally to look at one. He'll probably think you're crazy, but ask for me. I don't think he's ever really seen a sunset. And don't be so bugged over being a greaser. You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want. There's still lots of good in the world. Tell Dally. I don't think he knows. Your buddy, Johnny._

I set the letter down next to me, and looked at Ponyboy. He looked at his hands, then stood up, and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"Be right back."

I sat on my bed, staring at my open door, wondering where Pony went. Five minutes passed, and he came back with a notebook and a pencil. He sat cross-legged on my bed, and began writing.

"What are you writing?"

"My theme for English," he replied without looking up.

I looked over his shoulder as he scribbled across the page. When he finished the first sentence, he moved his hand so I could read it. It said: When I stepped out into the bright sunlight from the darkness of the movie house, I had only two things on my mind: Paul Newman, and a ride home…


End file.
